I come from a long line of worriers. It’s in my blood, and in my weakest moments I can worry with the best of them. Recently, I have (again) found myself in the position of having things to worry about. And I am (again) learning that times of uncertainty bring a bitter-sweetness to life that is good. When does a season of wanting feel like a season of plenty? When my eyes are opened to the subtle hand of God’s provision.
A number of years ago, I spent two weeks in the wilderness, enduring physical challenges unique to such a setting. I learned something important as I begged God for the strength to climb a mountain or the courage to scale down the other side. As I contemplated the days stretched before me and the hardships that most certainly lay ahead, I was overwhelmed by my inability to endure. But, lo and behold, the sun rose and set, and I had made it through another day. I discovered in the wilderness that God’s sufficient grace is allotted moment by moment, day by day. I don’t need next Tuesday’s grace; I just need grace to make it through today. It’s not a new or profound concept, but it is quickly forgotten in times of ease. Until we really feel our need, our inability, our desperation, it’s difficult to truly see the all-sufficient, perfectly capable, endlessly loving hand of God’s provision.
And Scripture’s mandate to be “anxious for nothing?” I had previously experienced this as a sort of burden to make myself relinquish my worries as I turned them over to God in prayer. What I now experience is the sweet freedom that comes from absolute uncertainty regarding future circumstances coupled with my absolute certainty of God’s care and provision. What a joyous thing to look to the future with hope and excitement simply because God holds it!
The season doesn’t change–it’s still a time of want. But my perspective on it does… as I learn to depend fully on God’s complete faithfulness, new mercies, and perfect plan.
3 Comments
July 16, 2008 at 2:25 pm
I recently read a quote that stated…”God doesn’t give us grace for our imaginations.” He gives us grace for the moments we need it not when we are dwelling on the what if’s and wondering if we can make it through
Blessings,
Sharon
July 18, 2008 at 9:44 am
I’ve been thinking about this post the last 2 days. Mainly, trying to think of the “right” encouraging words. I see our Father has you where He wants you and your resolve to be obedient and grow in Him. Times like these allow much opportunity for that. When Tom and I were being tried very much through the same things my favorite book became Philippians because it is all about Joy in the midst of trial. To this day it remains a favorite. I also know that He is faithful and He has promised to supply all of our needs, not our wants but absolutely our needs. My definition of “needs” definitely changed through those times. We love you guys very much!
1 Corinthians 10:13; Matthew 6:25-34; Philippians 4:6
July 30, 2008 at 8:20 am
Hi Natalie!
I just wanted to tell you how much this post spoke to my heart and ministered to me today. Thank you, sweet friend, for having the courage to let the Lord speak through you.
I loved seeing the pictures of you and your family – so beautiful and precious! Hope you are all doing well
Love,
Jill